Today I picked a guy cold out of the phone book and cold-cocked him cuz I needed some cold cash. It seems cold-blooded but I left him with a cold pack, shot him a cold stare, and headed home, getting the cold shoulder all the way, as a cold front moved in. I ended up at my Cold Spring cabin, downed some cold cuts and cold slaw, avoiding my cold sore, sipped the cold beer I had intended to quit cold turkey and caught a little Cold Case on the tube.

I fell asleep for a spell then woke in a cold sweat to find a girl with a head cold in my bathroom, wiping cold cream off her face. She looked coldhearted, but I walked toward her anyway, 'til I got cold feet, took a cold shower, and forgot about her.

That was one cold day.

One week earlier I had received a hot tip from some hotshot who thought he was hot stuff. He said a hothouse down in Hot Springs had been turned into a hot haven for hot-aired Talk Hosts hot to hear themselves talk. The guy used to play the hot corner in my hot stove league spooning out hot dish and talking hot prospects. I grew up playing hot box with him and had the hots for his hot-blooded Latino sister and her hot pants. She'd pour hot toddies and put us on the hot seat, asking about hot dates we'd had, and we'd play hot potato with that topic 'til it got too hot to handle.

Those were the hot days.

Posted by TD Mischke at 4:20 PM
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